WE DO EVENTS | More Info
WE DO EVENTS | More Info
Like I’ve said previously, we are crispy, cold, and living in fear of the winter uglies hitting us like a tonne of bricks. (Babe, beware, I feel it coming)
I’ve already told you how to survive winter as an ex-uni student, but now we’re taking it one step further: ranking winter social activities.
Maybe it’s inspiration or maybe it’s me writing with complete free will. Maybe it’s just another shameless plug.
Keep reading to find out x
It’s a beautiful concept in theory. A fit, healthy gym routine, a cute activewear set, and suddenly you’re becoming the best version of yourself. You’re organised. You’ve got your life together. You probably meal prep too.
Then, shock horror, it’s dark by 5pm, it’s raining sideways, your couch hits you with a “u up?” text, and suddenly you’re ordering Grill’d on Uber Eats and making your jolly way home.
True story? Maybe. I’m not legally required to confirm.
Points for motivation. Points deducted for the fact that winter is stronger than my willpower.
We all know this girl (she is me).
You say, “Let’s just grab one,” fully believing yourself, which is honestly the funniest part. One turns into two, someone orders fries “for the table”, someone starts oversharing about their situationship, and now you’re emotionally invested in a man named Jake that you will never meet.
Suddenly it’s 12am, you’ve spent your weekly budget on cocktails and kebabs, and you’re deep in a conversation about whether you should both move overseas next year.
You wont, but for those forty minutes, you genuinely believed in a life beyond the 9–5.
Points for the memories made. Points deducted for the emotional damage to your bank account.
Look, I will never hate on her. A fluffy blanket, a comfort show you’ve seen eleven times, a cup of tea… who am I kidding, a cheeky glass of wine. No social battery required, some might say she’s elite. The only issue is the slippery slope. One cosy night turns into four consecutive weekends, your “quick episode” becomes an entire season, and your closest relationship is now with a fictional character who doesn’t know you exist (hi McSteamy).
At some point, your friends stop sending “what are we doing this weekend?” texts and start sending “are you alive?” texts, and you have to admit that no, you haven’t been busy…
Points for comfort. Points deducted because eventually you do need to remember what your friends look like in person, not just through Instagram stories.
An elite concept absolutely destroyed by Melbourne weather.
On a sunny winter morning, she is everything. The activewear is on, your podcast about becoming the coolest diva to walk the earth is playing, you’re on your way to hitting your 10,000-step goal, and you’re essentially THAT girl.
Then Melbourne remembers who she really is and delivers rain, hail, wind, sunshine, and a full identity crisis before noon. Your iced latte is freezing your hand, your hair has doubled in size, and it all feels like a very targeted personal attack.
Points for wellness. Points deducted because the weather has a personal vendetta against us specifically.
Coffee in hand, beanie on, cute cavoodle sightings every ninety seconds. You’ll buy a handmade candle you absolutely did not need (and I’m willing to bet it was vanilla scented).
That’s the magic of the markets. It’s a genuinely wholesome winter activity that makes you feel like a functioning member of society before midday, which during winter is quite the achievement.
Points for wholesomeness. Points deducted only because finding a park requires the patience, strategy, and emotional regulation of a military operation.
She’s the veteran of all social activities. The reliable one that never lets you down. Pizza tastes objectively better in winter, I don’t make the rules, I simply report them and there is no better setting for a full-table debrief than somewhere warm with a banging cocktail list and carbs to match.
The only reason she doesn’t take the number one spot is because someone always, always, says, “I have an early start tomorrow,” & suddenly everyone is splitting the bill at 8:37pm like we’re under curfew, BORING
Points for the catch-up. Points deducted because the night ends right as someone says, “Okay, don’t tell anyone this, but—”
Need a place to talk sh*t with the girlies?
And here she is, the people’s princess.
She’s long enough to actually catch up none of this 45-minute, one-eye-on-the-clock business where you’ve barely scratched the surface of the week’s housemate drama before someone has to leave. You’ve got good food, even better drinks that just keep on coming and no pressure to move onto the next venue.
There’s no nightclub queue, no standing outside in the freezing cold pretending you’re having fun. Plus, nobody can deploy the “I have an early start tomorrow” escape route because babe, it’s the middle of the day.
It’s just a few solid hours of carbs, cocktails, gossip, and solving approximately zero of your problems while somehow feeling significantly better about all of them. Which, honestly, is exactly what winter is all about.
Winter is long, your couch is tempting, and your group chat will continue saying “we should all do something soon” for approximately six more weeks without a single date actually being locked in.
If you’re going to put something in the calender this season let it be our new winter bottomless brunch. 5 sessions, bottomless bevs and off course delicious food! and yes, this was the shameless plug all along. I told you to keep reading.
Winter is significantly easier to survive with a little bit of delusion, a lot of pinsa pizza, and a cocktail in your hand (that might I add, is bottomless).
